The official welfare system at Cambridge seems considerable. Within colleges, each student is assigned a tutor and Director of Studies, and has access to college nurses, chaplain, counselors and wellbeing teams. Yet alongside this formal infrastructure, the informal tradition of college families has not only survived but become equally embedded in the culture at Cambridge. Why is it, with such extensive provisions already in place, that many students seem to turn to the second years they were assigned before even arriving at university for support?

For many, college families have been central in offering guidance beyond the first days of Fresher’s Week. A first year student at Girton recalls how important their college parents were in providing them with the sense of community they were looking for in Cambridge: “my [college] mother helped me meet other Malaysians and other people doing my course”. For another student, their college family also did more than “explain many Cambridge-isms such as what a DoS/supo is” and “how to prepare for a supo” in the first week. Their family gave them a sense of “connection,” allowing them to “feel sociable and comfortable” in their college.

“College families have been central in offering guidance beyond the first days of Fresher’s Week”

For other students, the support provided by their family was more practical. A first year Emmanuel student remembers that their college parents “helped me find my way around the college during the beginning of Michaelmas”. A first year student at Newnham seconds this, their college parents “gave me advice about my supervisions because they’d had the same supervisor and I was nervous about the supervisions”.

However, not all students felt well-supported by their college families. Several expressed frustration at being abandoned by their college parents early on during Michaelmas term. A third year student at St John’s couldn’t recall a single time that their college parents had helped them, noting that: “They didn’t show up! We tried to organise a coffee, the first couple of times proposed by each party didn’t work, and then they stopped replying!”

A third year student at Fitzwilliam was so disillusioned with their college family that they chose not to pass the tradition on: “I didn’t try establishing a college family when I got into second year because I couldn’t really be bothered with a system that hadn’t benefitted me. I didn’t want to perpetuate the cycle of neglect”. They added: “I think college families are a nice enough idea, but rely on you getting along with your college parents. If you get paired into a good match, it probably works great!”

“I have a better relationship with my college family than the welfare team at College”

For those who were unlucky with the college family pairing, the formal welfare systems provided by college would seem like the most obvious alternative to turn to when in need.

A survey of Cambridge students I conducted reveals that this may not always be the case. 76.9% of students stated that they know of the welfare support provided by their college, but only 23.1% stated they “frequently” used these resources. Indeed, 46.2% – the single largest group – said that they “rarely” used their college’s welfare system. For these students, awareness does not automatically translate into use.

The same student at Fitzwilliam who was estranged from their college parents also told me that they “rarely” used the welfare support system offered by their college. A first year student at St Edmund commented that they “never” spoke to their college family, and also stated they rarely used the college welfare systems.

For them, the welfare system seemed too “convoluted” and failed “to relay between key figures of the college”. A third year student at Jesus concurred, describing the booking process as “cumbersome” as it requires students to “send emails to ask for an appointment” rather than access support directly.

“College families filled the gap I thought a college welfare system should have covered”

For others, the issue with college welfare systems lies less in bureaucracy and more in the emotional distance between students and staff trained to support them. One student commented that “I have a better relationship with my [college family] than the welfare team at College”. They highlight that it is often easier to confide in students with shared experiences, rather than welfare staff that must follow protocol.

A second year student picked up on this underlying tension between students and welfare staff, speculatively mentioning that “I’ve heard bad reviews about College not talking people’s problems seriously”.

For these students, the problem seems to be a lack of emotional trust and doubts whether their concerns will be met with genuine understanding or complicated procedure. One student summarised the welfare situation like this: college families “filled the gap I thought a college welfare system should have covered”. For these students, college parents seem to be the first port of call for the kinds of conversations that formal welfare systems were designed to have with students.

The enduring popularity of college families does not necessarily suggest a parallel failure in University welfare structures. But student responses suggest that, as a result of both logistical obstacles and emotional distance, formal systems can sometimes feel difficult to access. For some students, the college family has become the support system that they can trust most.

But the success of college families also depends on the luck of the pairing and the willingness of both parents and children to show up. For those faced with a formal system that feels inaccessible and an informal network that hardly materialised, reliable support can be harder to find than Cambridge’s extensive welfare resources might suggest.