It’s hard not to have a spring in your step when you have bright pink hair. My shorter cut means I occasionally forget my hair’s fluorescence, so the warm smiles and enthusiastic compliments come as a bonus surprise element. External validation aside, there’s something quite freeing about having hair that a primary-school-aged version of you only dreamed of. Even the disapproving stares can be a bit of an ego boost (though that level of confidence takes time to build up to).

“For some reason, I’m met with nervous laughter every time I recommend Superdrug’s semi-permanent hair dyes to a man?”

However, even after my many years of growing aesthetic boldness, this summer exposed a bittersweet reality to my self-expression: many people are too scared to follow suit. Where possible, I try to follow up any compliment with advice on how to recreate whatever look they’re drawn to; I have little to no fine motor skills, so there’s never anything particularly technical involved when it comes to my hair and make-up. The response? Their faces drop, perhaps they shake their heads slightly, and insist that they’re “too old” or “too shy”. And that’s just the women; for some reason, I’m met with nervous laughter every time I recommend Superdrug’s semi-permanent hair dyes to a man?

A younger version of me would be shocked by my confidence. Don’t let my new-found ability to talk to strangers and handle their judgement put you off of this lifestyle, though. When I first developed somewhat of an alternative look, I was terrified to try new outfits, and I had to ignore the thought of people daring to perceive me during my fashion forays. While some of my worries were unnecessary, I was also forced to overcome my fears of the inevitable, from the impending wardrobe malfunctions to the terror-inducing interactions once I did get an outfit right (I’m autistic and a Londoner, a combination that breeds unnecessary social anxiety).

“A simple comment about something I chose to wear (out of desire rather than out of expectation) exerted a great deal of social control”

But I found that the people who did start complimenting me were a lot like me in many ways. You could see it in their faces as they would glance over, away and over again before eventually building the courage up to talk to me, a quiver sometimes still remnant in their voice. I also learned that, of all things, a simple comment about something I chose to wear (out of desire rather than out of expectation) exerted a great deal of social control. That’s when I slowly started to use it as a conversational tool. Along came the research into my aesthetic, the more thought-out and ethical fashion decisions, the self-curated artforms like tattoos and make-up looks. Looking back, the conscious immersion in alternative culture has helped change my well-being, and had monumental effects on how I go about my life. To think that that’s all thanks to a bit of black lipstick, some bleach and a pair of clippers…

“Those of us who choose to stand out can reap further rewards”

Interactions within my neighbourhood this summer, especially with those of older generations, have made me worry that people are missing out on these benefits. Take the Cambridge cohort; it’s surprisingly rare to see unnatural hair or any unusual styles aside from loosely sporty or indie. These are undeniably equally beautiful, and if done with enthusiasm, I have zero qualms. The trends themselves aren’t worrying, but rather the unquestioning engagement with trends which make them total normalcy, just because they’re the easier option. Regardless of your aesthetic, there’s something life-affirming about having a story to tell and a sense of self within your dress sense, whether it be the conversations with your tattoo artists or the excitement of that charity shop find. Those of us who choose to stand out can reap further rewards in sharing these tales and inspiring others to follow suit.

It’s safe to say that my relationship with my style is disproportionately sappy, and this trajectory isn’t for everyone. But it’s clearly for some people, or else I wouldn’t receive the awe-struck looks simply for donning pink hair in my local supermarket. If not for the emotional epiphany or mental health breath-through, let yourself be bold for the simple thrill of it all. Seeing a change materialise is exciting, and there’s no harm in a bit of extrinsic motivation and fishing for compliments from time to time. Do something radical and let in a bit of selfish positivity – as Gabrielle Saraway argues, self-love is rare, but a bit of audacity can be vital. Allow your unique aesthetic to express itself: an authentic switch-up is the ultimate power move, and it goes far beyond the visual.