You’ve got a 9am lecture on a Thursday, and you can’t risk a hangover, but all of your friends are going out to Revs. You also have a 9am netball match against your biggest college rival, but it’s your friend’s birthday Frash? You’ve missed many nights out, then been told at debriefs “you just had to be there,” and you can’t quite deal with the FOMO any longer. Why not give a sober night out a go?

I’m here to dispel the idea that sober clubbing is no fun. As a non-drinker who went to six of the eight Wednesday Revs in Lent term last year (75% attendance by the way), and cried because I was so ill that I had to miss those two, I definitely like clubbing. In fact, there have been several times over the past two years that I have been the one complaining about leaving the dance floor, or made friends stay until lights on just having a boogie. Now, let me take you through one of my favourite nights-outs, a sober Mash.

“The first step to any good night out is the pres”

The first step to any good night out is the pres. For me, these tend to happen in the college bar more than in people’s rooms. My drink of choice: always a diet coke. Often these are free at college bars, like Sidney, or just charged as a mixer so cost £1, like in Magdalene. As a prolific coffee drinker, I do love a caffeine fix before a night out. Alternatively, I know people who go for an orange fanta, while I am also partial to a sprite. You can already see the cost-benefit analysis of a sober night out.

The next location has to be Wetherspoons. Once again, you can buy an unbelievably cheap drink – my go-to is a lime soda for 38p. This is normally the time when everyone else is pretty smashed, or well on their way there, so I make sure I’m energised enough to match their energy level (and noise levels!).

Ideally, this Frash happens after a college bop to ensure that the club is full of plenty of people you already know, which makes the debrief so much better at brunch the next morning. It is definitely a lot cheaper not drinking, as while my friends are busy ordering four jagerbombs at the bar, I am enjoying a refreshing (free) cup of water.

“I would rather be dancing to whatever poorly mixed playlist the DJ decides to delight us with this Friday”

Personally, I am just at the club for a dance, so the more time spent on the dance floor, the better. Sure, I enjoy a wander around, or a quick stop in the smoking area, but I would rather be dancing to whatever poorly mixed playlist the DJ decides to delight us with this Friday.

Now, the moment comes when either the lights are on, or it’s just time to go. It will always amaze me how fast the Cambridge clubs clear out, once it hits 2 am. I will gleefully skip down the road to either Taco Bell or Gardies to get my chips. I then eat them with no complaints of nausea. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said of my friends.

Last of all, we all walk back, busy debriefing the night’s activities. When I get home, I always take off all my makeup, remember to set my alarm, and go straight to sleep. I’m able to wake up, maybe not refreshed – having turned 20 I can no longer hack a 4 am bedtime – but definitely not hungover. Either way, it’s a win in my book.

Whether you are not drinking because you are on a sports drinking ban, never do, or you just fancy a non-drinking night, why not give a sober club night a go?