‘What am I doing? Am I making a mistake?’ were the anxiety- induced questions circling my brain as I made my way to Cambridge Station. It was the middle of exam season, my third exam of five was imminent and yet I was heading off to London to see The Living Tombstone live. ‘Are you insane?’ is the question I could imagine my younger self asking, as although I had been in the spaces in which The Living Tombstone’s music gained popularity I had never listened to one of their tracks in full, being far too insecure as a teen to even consider listening to songs inspired by My Little Pony or Five Nights At Freddy’s regardless of how catchy they were.

My anxieties quickly dissipated once I arrived at the venue as the streets filled with cosplayers of all kinds, parents accompanying tweens, goths and many others with incredible fashion sense. I did get a little enjoyment from the confused faces of onlookers and security staff who had underestimated the popularity of the show, baffled by what was unfolding.

“Completely unafraid to engage in the silliness of the entire night, something that allowed me to let my guard down and enjoy the evening without fear of feeling ‘cringe’”

The show soon began with the stage lit up by the band’s impressive LED suits, each performer colour-coded, flaunting a stage persona and distinct vibe. I later learned these came with an impressive amount of fictional backstory enough to keep any Five Nights at Freddy’s fan satisfied. The audience didn’t have long to wait, as we were immediately met with the electronic track ‘I Can’t Fix You’, one of many video game-inspired tracks. The Living Tombstone’s discography could be fittingly described as intense, making it the perfect soundtrack to releasing pent-up exam stress.

No opportunity for crowd interaction was missed, from waving and jumping to something known as a ‘meow chant’ which involved meowing to tracks and was a way of testing whether the audience was ‘cool’. One of the more memorable moments of the evening came after a particularly intense song – the audience were asked to take a deep breath together, something which the whole room engaged with. It was clear that everyone in the crowd was completely unafraid to engage in the silliness of the entire night, something that in turn allowed me to let my guard down and enjoy the evening without fear of feeling ‘cringe’. That breathing exercise felt almost healing, with the insecurities of my younger self falling away as I embraced the insanity of the moment.

The night continued with performances of more video game-inspired tracks, from ‘Squid Melody’ to ‘Basics in Behaviour’. Though it was clear which track everyone was waiting for, and when the band began an argument over gaming, we knew what was about to unfold. This was the introduction to the track ‘No Mercy’; its premise being two terrible teammates arguing over a game of Overwatch. I clearly remember the track’s virality on early TikTok, where something beginning as a referential and cheeky number soon became a way for people to mock typically ‘nerdy’ interests. That history was long forgotten here, with the crowd and the band revelling in the nerdiness of the entire track, screaming lines which definitely confused the parents in the crowd. Once again, I felt like I was healing the wounds of the younger me.

“I felt like I was healing the wounds of the younger me”

Not all of the tracks performed during the evening had their roots in pop culture, and it would be reductive to paint The Living Tombstone as a nerdy internet band; showcasing tracks from their newest album Rust, the band had clearly come a long way from their internet origins. The Living Tombstone were not the only performers on stage throughout the night, with an incredible opener in The Stupendium and special appearances from Mr Weebl and Odyssey Eurobeat, joining to perform remixes of their tracks. It was the perfect tribute to the fandom and internet culture of the past that allowed creatives like these to flourish. The joy I experienced screaming the lyrics to ‘Discord’ is unlikely to be beaten. A track inspired by My Little Pony, the support I felt admitting the love of a show I was bullied out of enjoying in my teens felt unmatched.

This was the most magical feeling of the night; relishing in my interests alongside thousands of others, enjoying catchy electronic rock tracks and for a few hours forgetting the pressure of the Cambridge exam term. I couldn’t help thinking about how much I’d grown in the past few years. From an undiagnosed autistic tween who was too embarrassed and uptight to admit her interests into a (slightly) more confident young adult, unafraid to be seen as cringe. The show is one I won’t be able to shake for a long time, as I felt a strengthening connection with the band, the crowd, and the younger me.