TAKEN: Freddie Green

For a town packed to the brim with students and tourists, locals and buskers, Cambridge can be a remarkably lonely place.

Once the inhabitant has reluctantly absorbed all the vodka-fuelled excitement of freshers’ week and once Lent term’s harsh, frosty weather brings even harsher essay deadlines, the laughter and cheer of this place can become a distant echo.

It’s something that they don’t mention in the prospectus and I’m pretty sure it doesn’t feature in the promotional videos. Cambridge does lose its charm. And when that happens, you need someone there to remind you that this is, in fact, not real life. Your real job will not involve you weeping softly into the early hours of the morning, stoked up on blue bolt, wishing you had accepted that BBB offer from Edinburgh instead. Having a partner at Cambridge is the ideal escape from all that.

First of all, despite all of the Daily Mail articles claiming Cambridge is a completely generic British town, it is a perfect place to go on a date. The abun- dance of kooky coffee shops and hidden restaurant gems offers boundless opportunities for romantic encounters. Indigo, just off King’s Parade, is not subject to the usual volley of snaps from tourist’s cameras – it’s just a classic ‘little place I know.’

Soon enough, the bitter monotony of exam term will set in, and produce the ‘triangle effect’ – the sad byproduct of unending revision where life gradually comes to revolve around bedroom, library and hall. Having a partner in Cambridge can break this deadlock and assure that the latter doesn’t become your ‘fun’ place to be for the day. Whether it’s a revision break quickie or just a ther- apeutic rant about the unjustified amount of Tang Dynasty poetry you’vebeen required tolearn,a partner offers much in exam term.Awkward moments with inop-portune bedders may arise and porters may develop a surprising familiarity with your sexual schedule. But I can’t think of a better place in which to be in a relationship.

Besides, Cambridge has an astonishing array of talented students from every corner of this globe, many of them destined for great things.That’s something to which a quick, one-off pull in Cindies just doesn’t do justice. This place deserves more than just life as a singleton. 

SINGLE: Laura Hobbs

Far too many articles have been written about being single. But as of yet, not enough of them have been specifically about being single at Cambridge. What are the three biggest advantages of single life at this university? 

1) Boyfriends are time consuming. In between working, sleeping, getting drunk and being a CV slut, the average Cambridge student does not have much free time. When you have a boyfriend/ girlfriend there is an obligation to spend some of your precious spare hours with them, having dinner, drinks, or couple-y film nights. All of that time that could be better used drinking or sleeping. And if your darling doesn't go to Cambridge? Well then you have to spend even more time explaining why you are so busy. And no matter what you say, they will never really understand.

2) They steal your sleep. Sleep is one of the most precious commodities in Cambridge. Sometimes having someone to curl up with is perfect. When it's cold outside they can keep you warm. But there are other times its just annoying to have to share your bed. Cambridge beds are small - far too small to share for nights on end. If you are with someone, then it is supposedly mean to kick them out and tell them to cycle back to their own bed. But when you are single, you are under no obligation to share your precious crib. Having someone stealing your duvet or, God forbid, talking in their sleep, is the last thing you need. And if your beau rows? Welcome to your 6am wake up call. Lucky you.


3) Not having to listen to the boring details of someone else's day. If your boyfriend is having an essay crisis you have to be sympathetic - not just tell them to pull themselves together and write their damn essay. You have to listen to whining about staying up all night, how difficult their subject is, or, even worse, about that hilarious time they chundered everywhere. Singles don't have to put up with any of this. And - of course - it is only if you are single in Cambridge that you can take full advantage of all the delights Cindies has to offer.