After a term of being committed to cooking well, you’ve reached breaking point – as has the sink, from all the unwashed utensils.  This week, for your delight and delectation, I bring you not a recipe, but a review. We will go around the world in 800 watts, accompanied (obviously) by none other than the good old Sainsbury’s ready meal. 

In order to have enough stomach space to properly assess the full scope of what’s on off er, I had to gather together a group of dedicated Downingites, since dubbed theFamished Five, to use as my willing guinea pigs for this ready meal taste test. It was at this point that fellow linguist extraordinaire Emily Heslop had the brainwave of a table, with marks out of 10 in the categories of tastiness, sauciness(yes, that’s what I said), value for money and health. What follows are the results of our cultural (if not quite culinary) adventure.

Healthy: Smoked Haddock, Pea and Spinach Risotto 7/10

We started with the healthy option, a risotto from Sainsbury’s My Goodness range. We ate. We discussed. We judged. It was creamy, if a little lacking in seasoning, but also fi lling, and lived up to its healthy name with some chunks of fi h and peas to be spotted amongst the rice.  The risotto did well, stumbling slightly in the value for money category at £3 a pop (or 2 for £5, which is better).

Italian: Bolgnese or Chicken and Bacon Bake 7/10

The bolognese from the Classic Italian range was everything you would expect a bolognese to be. There was pasta, there was mince, it was “enjoyable but not memorable” (Alex Cook, engineer) and came out equal to the risotto. The chicken and bacon pasta bake from the same range received similar marks, however, a £2 each (as part of a 3 for £6 deal on any Classic Italian or stickered meal) they are pretty good value.

Indian: Chicken Tikka Massala 7.5/10

From Italy’s finest cuisine to the rich aromas and delicate spices of the Orient, curry was next on the list, and I have to say was greeted with great anticipation by my trusty tasters. Creamy and filling, with a good level of spice for a curry, it was brilliant value at half price and was awarded the most points so far accordingly, despite the health front (that health wheel was not happy). Even more exciting was the naan bread I purchased to go with it, 2 for 75p and easily ‘grilled’ in a toaster.

Asian: Singapore Noodles 6/10

Ever onwards to Singapore and its fabulous noodles. Or not so fabulous, as it turned out, being labelled “highly dubious” by architect Will Haynes. Having given them a good stir, they looked much more edible, and we set to with gusto. However, my guinea pigs were not impressed. As Chris Corley, engineer, so aptly put it: “I’d be reaching for the soy sauce."

Chinese: Chinese Chicken Curry 5/10

Their Chinese counterpart fared even worse, bringing up the rear of the table and then some. It lacked any definable taste, which was odd as it was the spiciest of all the ready meals. As well, at 2 for £6, the noodles and curry are not as good value.

British: Shepherd's Pie 8/10

World weary and travel worn, we returned home to the humble shepherd’s pie, and were pleasantly surprised. It was tasty, with good mash on top and lots of sauce not too staggeringly full of saturated fat, and at £2 was pretty good value too. In fact, it ticked all the boxes, and came out top.