The boxer David Haye sparked a controversy back in September with an ill-judged allusion to gang rape. I wonder whether this can truly be pardoned with that nonchalant shoulder-shrug of an excuse, ‘banter’.

In some ways, that typically postmodern (or is that post-postmodern?) phenomenon of addressing with irony and cynicism all the taboos of our parents’ and grandparents’ generations is opening up greater sexual equality. (It bridges the gap between chat and stereotypically feminine ‘gossip’, for one thing.) But, nevertheless, its most celebrated forms are thinly-veiled, satirical sexism. Any ‘get-back-to-the-kitchen’ joke, however sarcastically pitched, still promotes chauvinism and permits the perpetuation of the gender stereotypes they claim to mock.

The evolution of new, parodic meanings for the word ‘rape’ similarly sees the most violent and blatant disregard for a person’s rights as a light-hearted prank. From the current ‘frape’ (Facebook rape) craze, to the tinfoiling, post-it noting ‘room rape’ vogues – call me a killjoy, but these jokes have no place in a world in which it is estimated that 25 per cent of women will experience some form of rape in her lifetime.

Yes, we should all have a sense of humour regarding our misfortunes. Yes, we should adopt a light-hearted approach to life. But rape is one of the most horrific things that can happen to a person; a fact which offenders ultimately deny by persisting in their day-to-day use of ‘harmless’ banter.

Banter assumes, prematurely, that the gender stereotypes we mock are already dead – a presumption easily made in the relatively egalitarian bubble that is Cambridge. We cannot allow ourselves to forget the realities of what I must, somewhat ludicrously, refer to as the ‘outside world’; nor must we fail to acknowledge how recent the history of the struggle for gender equality is.

As a girl who was once commended for her command of ‘lad banter’, the fact that this came as a surprise is disconcerting to say the least. Yes, banter is capable of scaling the pure heights of undiminished homosociality, just as bitching lends itself to (although not exclusively) being an all-girl activity. But, Lads of Cambridge, don’t think we don’t understand why you like to ‘watch 4oD’ by yourself in the evening, or what ‘three o’clock’ means. We may not sympathize, but we understand: we speak banter too.