Incest (well almost), decapitation and Jupiter descending on an eagle - what more could you want from your Part I set text?

I present Cymbeline, which barely features Cymbeline but is mainly about Innogen, also called Imogen. If you ever see an Engling with a look of intense confusion on their face, they have probably drifted into this land – which has been portrayed as post-Brexit Britain, but also with a Roman Empire. As you may have guessed, this play doesn’t enjoy being categorised, despite attempts to label it as a Tragedy, a Tragicomedy, and a Romance. Fear not, it is time to untangle this bird’s nest of a play.

Summary

Innogen marries a guy called Posthumus who is supposedly very amazing, but King Cymbeline (her dad) and her evil stepmother want her to marry Cloten, aka her stepbrother. This is a bit problematic given that he’s got murderous, rapist and illiterate tendencies.

Posthumus is banished to Rome, and in true gap-yah style, is embroiled in the banter of his foreign friends. He had given Innogen a bracelet and in return received a ring from her. Posthumus gets all defensive about Innogen being the most virtuous woman ever, and bets his new-found friend Iachimo 10k ducats vs his ring that Iachimo wouldn’t be able to seduce Innogen.

Iachimo readily takes up the challenge. Upon his journey to Britain, he realises he is not as smooth as he thought he was, but won’t be deterred from the bet. Instead, he hides in a massive trunk which Innogen allows to be stored in her room, gets out in the middle of the night and has a bit of a snoop (conveniently, Innogen had decided to keep her bedside candle burning overnight). He takes a mental note of the room, the mole on her breast (ew), and steals the bracelet which he presents to Posthumus as conclusive evidence for his faux-shag.

“If you ever see an Engling with a look of intense confusion on their face, they have probably drifted into this land”

The wonderful Posthumus gets mad and orders Innogen’s servant Pisanio to kill her. Pisanio is quite nice, and, having taken Innogen to Wales where she thinks she’s meeting Posthumus, instead gives her his male garms and a potion which he thinks is a tonic given to him by the Queen. The Queen had thought this tonic was a poison. Yet – the physician who made it actually didn’t trust the Queen so it is just a temporary mega-sedative. Innogen is left to wander the wilds like Snow White, and takes the name Fidele.

Meanwhile, Cloten (Innogen’s stepbrother) is mad at being rejected again and dresses up in Posthumus’s clothing – vowing to rape Innogen and kill Posthumus who he thinks is in Wales too. Innogen/Fidele meets Belarius, Guiderius and Arviragus in a cave. G & A happen to be her long-lost brothers, but they don’t know this and have some kinda strange love thing going on. Cloten shows up and Guiderius decapitates him. Innogen/Fidele feels ill, takes the tonic and is presumed dead, so is placed in a cave beside Cloten’s headless body.

Later, Innogen wakes up and thinks that the decapitated Cloten, being dressed in Posthumus’s clothes, is Posthumus, and smears his blood on her face. Then she gets recruited by the Roman army who are invading Britain over a tax scandal and there is a massive battle where G& A almost singlehandedly defeat the Roman army.

Bard in Brief: King Lear

All the key characters end up back at the royal court after the battle. Posthumus, thinking he has killed Innogen, hands himself over to prison (somewhat grief-stricken), where he is visited by Jupiter on an eagle and some ghosts. The Queen dies of grief over Cloten’s death. Guiderius is nearly executed for killing Cloten until Belarius reveals that Guiderius is one of King Cymbeline’s sons who he kidnapped so it isn’t treason after all. It’s revealed to everyone that Innogen isn’t actually dead, either via Posthumus’s order or by the potion. Posthumus doesn’t initially recognize Innogen as Fidele and his first reaction is to strike her and knock her out. Despite all of this, Innogen gets back together with Posthumus and everyone lives happily ever after-ish (well, apart from the Queen and Cloten).

Backstage

Marriage Count: 1 – just before the play starts.

Death count: 2 (+ many miscellaneous soldiers).

Best line – all ghosts: “Thanks, Jupiter"

Rating: 6/10