What did vegans do before smoothie bowls and chickpea juices?
Violet vegan columnist Anna Hollingsworth finds herself tasting foods she had no idea existed
I know, I know, we shouldn’t attach stereotypes to people based on something so superficial as what they eat. I mean, we’re all individuals – but looking at the trend-setting, vegan-for-the-vogue food sites, the plant-based community seems to be screaming out, “No, we’re not!”
Food fashion is hardly news. Weight-loss via grapefruits was a big hit in the 30s, and who hasn’t got a childhood memory of 90s Viennetta being dished out at a suitably festive function? Yet recipe-savvy vegans seem to be taking unity to whole new levels.
Carnivores like to repeatedly point out (accurately or not, I’m no NatSci) how my canine teeth are there for ripping the raw meat off carcasses and that therefore I should be making good use of their proper purpose. Vegan food fashion seems to have gone on a counteroffensive by purposefully annoying these self-made dentists and dishing out as much as possible from mushy-food-friendly bowls.
Obviously, a bowl in itself is nothing but a host for trend-determined nutrition. Porridge has made a major comeback from sturdy, old-fashioned nutrition boredom and entered a new hyped-up existence – and my goodness what options oats can offer (or millet, buckwheat, quinoa, or whatever your grain of choice is).
Not everyone appreciates the miracles porridge can work, mind you: one of my housemates gave me a genuinely pitying look when I excitedly said I’d be having porridge for dinner, and Snapchatting my sweet potato and gingerbread oatmeal received a less than appreciative response. Oh well, I guess great minds are always shunned.
“The vogue vegans among us are just human – ‘plant-based’ refers to the diet, not to the individuals following it”
Another tooth-friendly kick-start to your day is the smoothie bowl. Thought drinking a smoothie was cool? Maybe in 2016, but now it’s all about bowling it up. The concept is simple (or as simple as trendy cooking gets): make a thicker-than-usual smoothie with as many trendy veggies as possible, and top it off with granola.
The ultimate bowl, however, goes beyond breakfast and covers all the other meals of the day. I bring to you, the mighty Buddha bowl. To the uninitiated, the concept is basically just a mix of different foods in a bowl, but to the culinarily enlightened, it’s a matter of kitchen creativity, culinary genius, of choosing the perfect combination of starch, green and protein.
In the name of investigative journalism, I extended a lunch break or two to chop up sweet potato, boil red cabbage, perfect my fruity couscous, and even fry plantain in coconut oil, but let’s just say the visual quality of the resulting bowl was less than Instagrammable.
When not focusing on filling, nutritious, and, most importantly, social-media-presentable bowl-based cooking, even the vogue vegans among us are just human. (‘Plant-based’ refers to the diet, not to the individuals following it – based on the reactions being vegan attracts, though, it would seem like especially ardent meat-lovers take my intellectual capacity to be on the same level as that of a cabbage.)
Even they need a sweet thing or, well, quite a few. Forget sugar, flour, and baking powder as your baking staples, the vegan life is all about peanut butter. And I’d know better than most, as in my pre-vegan days I used to avoid the substance just as I now avoid all animal exploitation. But once I discovered that at least two thirds of vegan baking recipes included peanut butter in some shape or form, I had to brainwash my tastebuds to accept it and now I’m a full-on addict.
Yet even with bowlfuls of peanut butter, there was something missing from the vegan existence until late 2014. As content as vegans may seem to spoon everything out of a bowl, meringues were a big exception – even for vegans, they’re better crisp than scoopable. Bring on a curious stroke of genius à la French chef Joël Roessel, et voilà, aquafaba, the saviour of vegan desserts, was born. Now, aquafaba sounds Latin American enough to be the next big Shakira song, but its appeal may be dampened a bit if you look beyond the name: it’s the liquid you get in a can of non-drained chickpeas. Why on earth would anyone decide to give whipping up chickpea fluids a go, I don’t know, but the rest is vegan history: aquafaba turns into meringues and whipped cream aplenty, all sturdy enough to occupy a plate!
Aquafaba fanatics are now proclaiming that with the discovery of the liquid, there are no obstacles left for anyone to go vegan. How exceptionally perceptive: forget meat and eggs, most people transitioning to veganism would lament the loss of meringues most.
I never thought bowls, peanut butter and chickpea juices would be central to my life, but my internet history will tell you otherwise. Oh the things going vegan does to you
