I’m a lesbian and proud of it. I live in the hope that my self-acceptance and honesty about my sexuality represents a brick in the path to equality for all LGBT people. The atrocities of discrimination which so many people like me are subject to every day only emboldens me to go out into the world and parade my pride, so that, one day, it will no longer be necessary. 

The media constantly reminds me that I was lucky to be born into this society, while across the world there are people who will never be able to freely love who they wish. Homosexuality is still punishable by death in seven countries, in several of these by stoning. Recently, Russian politician Vitaly Milonov called for Tim Cook, CEO of Apple, to be barred from entering Russia because, as a homosexual, he could be carrying “the Ebola virus, Aids [and] gonorrhoea”. The Laramie Project currently playing at Cambridge’s Corpus Playroom reminds us of Matthew Shepard, the American student who was beaten to death in Wyoming in 1998, and the battle young people face daily just to be themselves. These injustices make me even more grateful and more determined in my resolve to be proud of who I am.

Yet, it is the homophobia I occasionally encounter on the streets of England that truly shocks me. How is it that in our liberal society, decades after the decriminalisation of homosexuality, and in the wake of marriage equality, there are still those who think it right to call me a faggot? It never fails to stun me. These attitudes, usually contained behind a disapproving scowl, seem to imbue a certain faction with the confidence to call a stranger ugly names like ‘faggot’. It’s easy to say that you should face up to bullies, but much more difficult to do in practice. Something about that two syllable f-word taps into whatever insecurity I still hold concerning my sexuality. I’ve been happily open about it for years, yet the word ‘faggot’ still has the ability to make me feel ashamed. 

The infamous Westboro Baptist Church aside, I don’t think people understand the weight of the word they are using when they shout at me across the street. ‘Faggot’ is increasingly used as part of ‘lad vocabulary’ and passed off as 'banter' amongst friends, without thought being given to the meaning of what is being said. Faggot, along with the word ‘gay’, is now used as a generic insult and one disassociated from homophobia. The use of such words outside of an anti-gay context, however, still validates the views of those who are homophobic and is degrading to those who identify as LGBT. I could simply have been the victim of lad banter, in the instances when I’ve been called a faggot, but regardless of the intent, I still felt humiliated. Words like ‘faggot’ cannot be detached from the colossal historic connotations they bear.

The etymology of the word ‘faggot’, in its modern usage, is largely unknown. While it was used in the sixteenth-century as a slur against old women who gathered kindling – ‘faggot-gatherers’ – the first known use in the modern sense was in 1914, with the word being shortened to ‘fag’ in 1921. More important than etymology, however, is the long history of discrimination to which LGBT people have been subjected, and which many still suffer. The recent film, Pride, taught me of the too-often forgotten story of connection between gay rights and the miners’ strikes – this history should be remembered.

There is a part of me that wants the word ‘faggot’ to be abolished, for it to be scrubbed out of the dictionary and out of our collective memory. However, having said that, it is a word which, despite its vague etymology, has importance within the LGBT community. The word should serve to remind us of the strides taken towards equality since the Stonewall Riots of 1969, events which are celebrated internationally at pride parades every June. These words of hate should never be used, but they should be remembered as part of LGBT history. I am acutely aware that I stand on the shoulders of brave men and women, and that abolishing the word faggot would not secure equality. Focusing solely on the use of the word would diminish their work and wrongly curtail the work left for us to finish.

It is not the word which needs to be abolished – it is the attitude behind its usage that needs to be condemned to history.